I have to be upfront here.  I am not a huge fan of wild animals.  Now, don't get me wrong.  I like a nice zoo just like everyone else.  But those animals are in ENCLOSED SPACES.  There is little or no chance that the giraffe is going to come over and try to eat my hand.  The apes are behind glass.  I can wave and that's just fine, Bombo can stay over there and eat his banana.  You will pretty much never ever be able to get me to go on one of those "safari" things.  I am not too big on going out hunting for that same reason.  Sure, I may have an advantage, but Bambi might have a grudge.

I don't like encountering animals that are not domesticated in my everyday life.  I had a garage sale last year, and I was petrified for about an hour because there was a possum in my backyard, and I was 100% sure it was going to bite off a toe or give me rabies or some other horrible disease.

Our station is on a small plot of land, so sometimes we have small mice or garden snakes that come inside.  I remember way back when newsman, Jack Miller - when he still worked here years ago- had to come and get a garden snake out from the production room with a garbage can because I couldn't go near it, much less touch it.

Don't bother telling me, "They're not going to hurt you."  I know a garden snake isn't like a cobra.  That changes NOTHING.  I don' t want to touch the snake, I don't want to go near the snake, and more importantly, I do not want it in the studios.  Someone else has to retrieve the mice found in the traps around the office.   I'm not gonna be the one to get some strange form of malaria from a field mouse.

I can handle dogs.  I can handle cats.  I can handle birds.  I can handle fish. I can probably even handle, you know, a small ferret or hamster or whatever.

By the way, this pretty much also applies to all bugs.  If I see a bug or a spider or a fly I instantly try to end it's feeble, short life by considerable measures.  My cat Kitten and I spent a good half  an hour attempting to kill a wasp not that long ago.   I can handle ladybugs and lightning bugs. Okay, and butterflies.  So I guess, by extension, that applies to caterpillars. But if there's a possibility of anything biting, stinging or somehow nesting eggs in my hair in  order to drive  me insane, I want none of it.  No ants, no beetles, no flies, no gnats, no fleas, no spiders, no junebugs, no silverfish, and CERTAINLY no roaches, bees, wasps, clover mites, or any of that noise.  And who are these people that keep tarantulas as pets? No thank you!

I will end all of their lives if need be. I don't care if I bring about the end of days because I've disturbed the balance of nature.  I am the type who puts out the ant killer and whatnot in March just to make sure those little jerks don't come in and try to make themselves at home. They will never, ever be okay around me.

What about you? What sort of creatures make you squeamish?  Or are you one of those fearless types that can take on anything?

Buggily yours,


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