White Shirts Are Evil

Okay, so it happened again today.  I put on a white shirt to come to work and by 5:30 a.m.  I had already spilled coffee on it. Spilled is the wrong word, more like dribbled coffee on it.

I have been wearing clothes for most of my 50 years.  Almost everyday I wear a shirt, and just as often I drink something! But only when I wear white shirts do I dribble like a newborn, or every lid of every cup of coffee I buy comes off.  Not when I wear blue or red, only those darned evil white shirts.

They are cursed or I am cursed or something is cursed.  Somebody get me a chicken's foot and a feather.